Friday, July 17, 2015

Conan Plays Minecraft on Xbox Live with Tips and Advice on Vision of Game

I asked what game you want me to rate. You guys said Minecraft. My friend, Aaron Blaire, and I are going to play Minecraft. I don't play video games. I'm not kidding. I don't know anything about this. I know nothing about it. I thought it was one of those -- neck massages from brookstone.

This game is about mining things and building things.

Taking out of the grounds and building things?


So it is like we are in Whales in the 19th century, and we are desperately poor. What a fun games for kids.

Every game for these kids are generated in this world. So we are walking around. We are in the forest.

I'm going through some grass. Is that a pig?

Do you see me?

Yeah. Hey, why am I wearing plaid pants.

This is the only guy with the orange hair.

So the guys in the orange hair wear stupid mad boxer shorts. That's discrimotory. Look. The sheep just gave me the look like, "what's with that guys?" The block sheep keeps checking me out. You are the guy that molested me last night. So we mine nothing.

Alright, just follow me right here. We are going to get some wood.

They put no effort into the graphics. This looks like a world if you glaucoma. This should be called glaucoma world. The pressure of your eyeballs is to high. Your vision is so impaired you put on mad shorts. That sheep keeps sniffing my butt. Get out of here. Get out sheep. Let's chop something down. For god-sake, nothing happened. We've grown poorer and older.

Now you are digging the ground.

Do I keep on digging to the ground?

You know. I fled Ireland to not do this.

At night time, monsters come out.

So the monster is coming after you.

Those are scary monsters.

My six year old can draw better monsters than that. Who designed this game?

So minecraft is very popular? So young people that can't see well likes this game. I'm so confused because I don't what we accomplished.

The makers of mine craft please. Please, go to the nearest Lenscrafters, and get fitted for some eyeglasses. Then makes a world that looks like a world.

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