Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Lavell Crawford Understands Tsunami Salami Relief in Indonesia

I run into stupid people where ever I go. I live in Los Angeles, and there's nothing but dumb people. This lady come up to me with a can, "Chingle, chingle, chingle. Tsunami relief. Tsunami relief." I looked at her, and said, "What's a Tsunami?" She looked at me, and was like, "Huh? You don't know what is a Tsunami is?" I went, "Huh? No, I don't know what a tsunami is?" She said, "You going to stand there and tell me. You don't know what a tsunami is?" I said, "Heffe, I stand where ever you want me to. I'm gonna tell you right now. I don't know what is a tsunami is." She really got pissed off, "You don't know!" I said, "Bitch, I told you. I don't know what the hell damn is tsunami is."

Last time I saw a tsunami was between two pieces of white bread, and I ate that crap with some corn chips. She got real mad and was like, "You bastard. That's not a tsunami. That's a salami." I was like, "tsunami, salami, baloney  -- get your stupid butt out of my face." I don't know what the hell is tsunami, crap.

I said, "where the hell is the tsunami happening?" She goes pulling out a globe, and start spinning that sun of a bitch. See that's the problem right there. When you gotta spin a globe to find a country, it ain't none of my damn business. She go spinning it and ends on Indonesia. I was like, "What the hell is Indonesia? I don't know nothing about Indonesia."

Last time I read about it and the tsunami, they said the animals were climbing to higher grounds. Now, that means gorillas, giraffes and cows walking up a mountain. That would've told me everything I needed to know. I was like, "excuse me Mr. cow, where in the hell are you going?" Cow said, "we going up this mountain." I said, "Crap, I'm right with you then." Apparently you know where the hell you going. Apparently they have the weather channel.

No comments:

Post a Comment