Friday, August 7, 2015

Donald Glover talks about Kids that are Sugar Addicts and Crave Cocoa puffs Vs Kix Vs Cheerios


Kids love sugar. My brother, Steven, loves sugar. He loves sugar. We were not allowed to have any sugary cereal as a kid. We weren't. We weren't allowed to have any sugary cereal as a kid. My mom would like get... We would only allowed to have to types of cereals. It was cheerios and kix. And cheerios is like cardboard doo doo. And kix is like the handjob of all cereals. It's like a little sweet. It's the hand-job of cereals cause it's like, "this is pretty good, but you really know what I really want." So like we would always go to the store. My brother was like, "I really want co co puffs. I really want cocoa puffs. Can we get cocoa puffs?" My mom would be like, "No. No. No. No, we are not getting coco puffs. No sugar. No. No. No."

And then one day my brother snapped. He just snapped. He's like, "Mom, everyone is eating it." My mom goes and grabs and goes, "Fine!" Throws it in the cart, and walks away. Me and my brother was like, "What?! It was that easy?"

So we go home, and we be skipping around like, "Yes. Yes. We are going to get coco puffs. This is so awesome. Yes. Yes. This is going to be so great. We are going to tell everyone at school that we had coco puffs."

And she... My mom was a Tupperware woman. And my mom goes over to the cabinet. And does the most devious thing that I have ever seen anyone do. She takes a big Tupperware container meant for cereal -- One of those big things you pour in and stuff. Opens it up. Takes a quarter of the coco puffs -- Just like the top, quarter. Pours it in there like, "blah blah." Then take a big box of kix, and pours like the whole thing on top of it. Shakes it up, so like the ratio was like 13,000 kix to 1 coco puffs. It's like spots of brown. It looks like a Kanye concert. That's what it was -- a Kanye concert. She takes the box, and slides it across table. And she was like, "there you go."

And my brother was like, "boo hoo." And he continues to pour some into the bowl, "You witch. How could you ruin this to me?" My brother was crying, and he still ate it. That's how much kids love sugar. That's how much my brother love sugar. He was an addict. He could have been, "F this. I don't need this." But he was like, "I still want it. I still want it..." It's like... If you love pizza, "Hey, you like pizza? There you go." You are not going to be like, "Oh you A hole." Don't eat the pizza. Don't eat it.

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