Thursday, June 12, 2014

Esau McGraw babysits his 3rd Grade Uncle

Got to get the money, so I can continue to avoid my family. They think I'm rich because I'm on tv. They all irregular man. Starting with my Grandma. Have 13 kids when she was way to young when she isn't suppose to. My mom also 13, get 8 kids of her own. She started getting them way to young when she isn't suppose to. I'm the middle of her 8. Long story short: I'm raising my uncle. He 9. I'm a grown man. He in 3rd grade. I'm his nephew. I pick up this punk from school. He jumps into my car, and he pulls up a family rant, "Fool make a left."

"I know where your house is. You living with me punk."

"When you go home. You better go to bed."

"No, you go to bed."

"No. you gonna go to bed."

"No. you gonna go to bed."

"You know my mama is yo mama's mama."

"I know. Yo mama is my mama's mama. Get your hands off my face uncle James."

My whole family is irregular. My cousin lost 115 pounds. They don't tell you is when you lose that much weight. You are gonna have all that extra skin left. This dude come to my house to go swimming. He took off his shirt. I'm like, "Man, what you doing, wearing that leather cape. Tuck your saggy back in. Nobody want to see that." He jump in the water. His skin expanded. He glide around the pool like a sting ray.

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