Friday, December 18, 2015

Bill Burr describes the most difficult Job for a mother is Actually an Easy Job

We were watching the other day. Oprah was on there. She was interviewing some tramp. You know. She is giving this big ridiculous intro like, "She done this. She done that. She done this. And she does the most difficult job on the planet -- she is a mother." Then she continues on.

Immediately I just look at my girlfriend. Like really? Being a mother is the most difficult job on the planet? Oh yeah, all those mothers died every year from black lungs, inhaling all that coal dust.

Women are constantly patting themselves on the back about how difficult their lives are. And nobody corrects them because they want to make love. Yeah, that is what it is. So there is this tornado misinformation, "I have the most difficult job on the planet."

What would you rather be doing -- Drilling the center of the earth, shaking hands with the devil? Every time there is a rumble ground, you wait for the whole thing to collapse down on top of you, so they can write that folks song about you. Or would you rather be up in the sunshine, running around with a couple of toddlers that you can send to bed anytime you want. I couldn't believe it.

"It's the most difficult job on the planet." Oh yeah, I thought roofing in the middle of July. I thought that was difficult. But these mothers are bending over to the waist, putting dvds in the dvd players. I don't know how they do it. I don't know how they do it. Dude, any job that you can do in your pajamas is not a difficult job.

Give me a break. You are 35 years old playing hide and go seek. You are living a dream. You are living a dream. No time card. No taxes. You are off the grid. Making popsticle stick houses. "It's the most difficult job on the planet. Oprah is not even a mother. How the hell she know?!

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