Friday, May 30, 2014

John Mulaney is a Terrible Driver. He only knows about the Cosby Show.

Now when people make fun of me, I deserve it. Uh, I do. When people get mad at me now, it's all my bad. I'm a terrible driver. I know nothing about cars. I meant to learn about cars, but I forgot. Nothing that I know can ever help out with your cars ever. Unless you're like, uh, "Oh, I got a flat tire, does anybody here knows a lot about the Cosby Show?"

"Oh perhaps, I can be some assistance."

I'm one of the worst drivers I have ever seen. And I just want you to know that if you are in highway behind me. Uh I hear you honking. And I also don't want me to be doing what I'm doing. I don't like that I am in that lane either, but i sure like to get out of it.

I was on the highway in Texas recently. Highway filled with 13 years old, and I was on the far left lane. And as I was in the far left lane, it turned into a U turn, a U turn only lane. And I started to make a U turn. Then I panicked cause I didn't want to make a U turn, so I put the car in reverse. And then merged right back on the highway. The best thing about that was that after that, cars were pulling up, and looking over to see who just did that piece of shit move, expecting to see like a hundred year old blind dog whose texting while driving and drinking a smoothie. Instead they see a 28 year old, healthy man, trying his best.

No comments:

Post a Comment